The Die is Cast – Perpetual Business Failure Matt Blomfield goes all trekky

The Die is Cast – Perpetual Business Failure Matt Blomfield goes all trekky, and rents some cyber space – to fill it with fraud, and dwarf cyber porn starring Ben Rachinger, Pete George, and Lynn Prentice.

A big thanks to website E2NZ.Org and their sister wordpress site trollsandcoolaid, who’ve been gracious enough to let us know that some of LF’s biggest fans have been missing our earlier “porno” themed posts;


Now whilst we don’t do “revenge-porn” or spin we have had a particular style when naming & shaming New Zealand’s criminal class, the local media included, which local Kiwi wannabe journo Jessica Williams is all too well aware of. So just for our fans, Williams included, we’ve decided to bring it back with the occasional cameo post.

LF, whilst doing its monthly fraud trawl through various websites in New Zealand, identified the new failure of Matthew John Blomfield. A company called “Bishop Warden” Limited [#96057468]. The only shareholder on record is serial fraudster and perpetual thief Matthew John Blomfield.


The new address of catastrophe is in the Auckland New Zealand township of Albany, about 12 kms north of the “coathanger” harbor bridge. Its registered office is Central Park Legal, or is that Central Park Illegal, given the machinations that occur within the walls of wickedness at 5/214 Universal Drive.

Close Blomfield associate, lawyer Bruce Johnson, given a temporary reprieve with the New Zealand Law Societies manipulation of their inquiries and the proceedings.

Legal wide [smile] boy Bruce Ronald “the clown” Johnson admitted to the bar at 3pm and leaves about 3am. Practiced law since 1988, but only in the game of fraudball. That’s where you pass the ball onto the creditors, and then fuck-off, creating the “score”. The game is known elsewhere as rortball. Bruce, and Matt get others to get onto their team but they never get to score because they are always left to play in the position of left right out. Their next venture……..

However, the fraudiness street address is kept secret, and the contact is online. The goals of the company are simple. Get those that are owed a bucket of money to inform Blomfield of their distress, and Blomfield takes advantage of their dilemma like he always does. We can imagine him having someone else introduce him as a lawyer, when he is nothing more than an unimpressive provocateur that is allowed to continue on his way to another bankruptcy taking every other silly cunt with him.

If you want to lose your pubic hair, yes he can sell that as well, then communicate with him by email at


Matts thinks he’s a joker, but no monster. We agree Matts no monster, hes a fraudster. And his real private email is cunt-act@bishopwarden.con

Funny story, or maybe it’s only a rumour. But apparently Matt got his black eye from running into one of his garden sculptures he painstaking hand sculpts out of clay his brother steals from earthworks. Someone sent us this pic of Matts backyard at Rame Road.


Matt claims to friends that its identical to his dick but only a miniature version. Allegedly, according to neighbours that have since left, on a warm night, Matt goes out into his garden and gives his clay cocks a good smoke. The same past neighbor says Matt has made his own “clay cockpipe” to smoke in his cars purchased through money laundering. He calls the foreground sculpture “dipshit”. He handcrafted it after he had just arse fucked Indian Shiv Mattu.

Matts site displays some nicked marketing that relates that the company is well funded, an impressive corporate, and above all, trustworthy and helpful.

Whereas anyone in the know will understand Blomfield only helps fill his own pockets. Blomfield explains the process he will undertake to nick your assets once he has involved you in illegal actions he alleges are designed to save your skin, when really he intends to skin his victims – or as Blomfield puts it;

Before we contractually commit to buying your debt we will:

  • Conduct a legal assessment of the status of the debt and the nature

  • and scope of any associated contracts.

  • Undertake a process of due diligence on the parties concerned.

  • Expect your full cooperation and disclosure of all pertinent details throughout the asssessment process.

Following a satisfactory conclusion to the processes outlined above we will then present a contract for signature and arrange for the immediate electronic transfer of the agreed amount to your account. Its that easy”

It is that easy for Blomfield as he is a complete fraudcunt. Blomfield has an unenviable track record of such criminal behaviour. Colloquially, getting fucked over by Matt is now known as getting a “Blomjob” or a “Mattrimming” i.e;

Man we warned Pete George about that Bishop Warden, and he still lost his underwear from a blomjob in front and a Matrimming from the back”

To add to the buckets of bullshit that Blomfield serves up he has taken on the Latin term alea iacta est, or “the die is cast”.

Truth be known, it is a term made famous to the populace because of its association to a Trekky Movie “The die is cast [Star Trek: Deep Space Nine]”. According to our sources it was Ben “cha-ching” Rachinger that brought the cinematic association to the attention of his deadbeat mate.


One’s a Spock and the others a Cock. [L] is the real Spock from another planet called Vulcan. [R] is a real Cock called Ben “cha-ching” Rachinger from the fullofnuts galaxy, where he resides mostly on the moon Aarrse that’s brown rim glides temptingly close to the dangerously fluid engorged planet, Purple Helmet

We think that Blomfield and Rachinger were on Blomfields cock smoking P pipe one Sunday when Blomfield stole the term off a bad screen writer whose unfortunate work was being played on Blomfields Beta Video Player because Blomfield had literally fucked his VHS player watching dwarf and disabled porn [dpp] he shot earlier that week that featured Rachinger as a Tranny called “Goldicock”.


The three unfortunate dwarfs that featured in Blomfields attempt at making a penistrating rehash of an old favorite that had an educational angle, which had the wanking title of “Goldicocks fucks three dwarfs three times each – do the math”. The guy in the middle has only one nut.

According to insiders, the movie is a series of sexincidents where other gangbang members initially try and get to blow all over Blomfields beard after skull fucking him, but Blomfield turns that tables around giving them his offer that they wanted to refuse, but didn’t because of the way the script was written.

Blomfield allegedly could not afford to pay his own acting fees, and so called in the help of some porno media moguls such as Pete George and Lynn Prentice, who jumped at the chance to invest in one of Blomfields movies where he fucks every silly cunt that comes within spunking distance. In the final scene they both get filled to the brim.


For the media cameras, Lyn Prentice and Pete George out of costume, on tour in New Zealand for the opening of “Rise of the flaccid cretins”

The movie was not a big hit other than with the cretins that visit their respective sucksites. Most comments were about the need for the costumes, and the vegetarian dildos that were home grown at Georges Glass House in Dunedin before being vacuum packed for freshness during transport to their trailer park studio before being used on each other.

This aspect of the movie making process led to vegetable rights groups protesting against the cruelty involved in the rape and sexual exploitation of vegetables by fruits.

This aspect of the movie making process led to vegetable rights groups protesting against the cruelty involved in the rape and sexual exploitation of vegetables by fruits.

The fruits George and Prentice responded “nothing went to waste, all of those vegetables were eaten and thoroughly enjoyed after repetitive use on the set”. According to LF insiders the soiled but firm ones were used for salads, and the ones that were a bit bruised and pulverized were used for chutneys.

According to insiders Prentice and George held a party to celebrate the end of filming and everyone but the close up cameraman turned up.


The close up camera man from “Rise of the flaccid cretins” would never recover after having said his last words “I’ve seen some shit”

Again according to insiders both George and Prentice decided to play the lead characters being that they would best connect with the intended audience.


The triple trailer trash wannabe porn starlets that George and Prentice said did not have the screen appeal to connect with their target audience – their current readership of their blogs, saying also that to accept the girls offer to work for free made the girls sound desperate

According to Pete George his fan club wanted to see George and Prentice “connect” on a level platform, like a bed, washing machine [whilst operating], a couch, bench top, or even on the boot, or bonnet, of a classic muscle car like a Leyland P76, or an Leyland Princess, both of which were used in the film from the Ben Rachinger Car-Art Museum of Automotive Achievers.


Who said Rachinger was bright? [L] is the P76, and [R] is the Princess in-situ in the museum that is situated in a field near the trailer park where the filming took place.

Unfortunately the P76 had no bonnet or boot, and the Princess was a “cut and shunt” which made for the bonnet and boot angles two difficult for the missionary or doggy style but worked for the 69er on the roof. In the end they decided to film a 68er, which is where Prentice gave George one, and George owed Prentice one.


The starlet called Sally they could not decide on, but took advantage of anyway. George wanted one hole and Prentice wanted the other, so in the end they spit-roasted this Kiwi Classic Barbie-Q? Watch out for their next venture in film secretly titled [till now] “When Sally swallowed Pete, but vomited Lyn”

LF’s investigations into Blomfields most recent business failure has been very in-depth. We even obtained the identity of Blomfields and Bishop Wardens first victim. The West Aucklander did not want to be identified, but let us take photographs of him as he entered and existed what he described as a Blommare. We did tell you that he was a Westie!!


We will refer to the victim as Joe Dick the first West Auckland “entrepreneur” targeted by Bishop Warden, before and after a “blomjob”. His horrific medical condition is known as defraudation . It sucks your wealth from you.

Blomfield got the guys rare 1976 HDT Holden LH Torana SL/R 5000 L34 driven to victory at Bathhurst by Peter Brock and Jim Richards, and swapped it for a rare as hens teeth Lada Soft Top Ute as a long term investment, because no other cunt wants to buy a Lada Ute. Its rumoured that the victim is related to Blomfield mainly because of the family resemblance and IQ – idiot quotient.


The rare soft top lada ute, obtained by Blomfield swapping the Brock/Richards lap and race record breaking shit box Holden Torana. The ute is seen stored in the Rame Road Garage, safe away from angry creditors.

But the Latin terms historical significance relates to when Julius Caesar was recorded by a scribe using the term when he crossed a place that meant that he knew that fate would decide his future in regards to his war against his own state. It is said that Caesar actually stated “let the die be cast” or “the die has been cast” – iacta alea est, inquit. So the term alea iacta est as used by Blomfield is not factually correct. Shit, go figure?

The irony is not lost on us, or the future victims of this scoundrel. Once you make the decision to join with Blomfield, your failure is sealed, but your rectum will never seal again.

To carry out this scam Blomfield has also nicked a modernized version of the emblem used by Barclays Bank, and photo shopped it onto a wall creating a completely fictitious image. Similarly, he has photo shopped the words Bishop Warden, with the Latin term alea iacta est underneath. Once again the photo shopping is obvious because the image on the left hand side [farthest] goes out of focus.

The fictitious images give the impression that Bishop Warden owns or leases a substantial central city high rise premise and would have lots of talented staff, and advisors. This is a lie.


Bullshit wanking more like. Blomfield makes Nigerian Internet criminals look bright

The image below was covertly caught by the LF fraudrone, as it passed over Auckland’s Northshore and caught Blomfield at downtown fairyfuckingfraudland, or otherwise an area known to other Aucklanders as residential Greenhithe where the locals get high on their houses building products, such as chipboard floors, hardie plank sidings, asbestos roofing, and of course PVC guttering into the concrete and fiberglass watertanks. Its not think before you drink, its drink and try and think. Blomfield has 8 Gallons daily, due to his need to piss into so many pockets.


Matthew Blomfield at work in the boardroom of the corporate offices of Bishop Warden.

Blomfield attempts to entice his victims with the following nonsense designed to enable the victim to hand over extremely commercially sensitive information on the basis that Blomfield has the talent and financial substance to deliver the purchase of the debt outright, or to fund litigation for a split of the results.

No hassles, no excuses, no negotiations, no repayment schedules. JUST MONEY UP FRONT”

Don’t let bad debts drag you down. SIMPLY SELL IT AND FORGET IT”

Simple immediate solutions for New Zealander companies dealing with bad debt”.

All that Blomfield has done is create the capacity to obtain information under false pretence in order to cause the victim to suffer a financial catastrophe which was the initial design of Blomfield. Imagine an actual law firm committing to this devious deception. It would never happen.


Bishop Wardens real headquarters at the rear of Rame Road. According to rumour its not like a book. You can Judge what the inside is going to look like. At dusk apparently patch wearing creditors come calling but can’t get inside to get Blomfields stash.


Lying cunt caught again advertising his photo shopped financial backing. Imagine if an actual corporate did this, when it was found out to be a complete scam. The msm would be all over it as long as the criminals did not advertise with them. The one on the right is allegedly Bishop Wardens corporate seal on Blomfields fraudsite lol.

Blomfield will then entice the person to shift assets and cash into Blomfields schemes to allegedly hide assets from creditors, and will charge savagely for this purpose, but only after having given a low estimate for the initial cost. Of course Bruce “golden goose” Johnson will take his payment after having completed his “fees-ability” study of Blomfield’s fraud.


The first pie is what Matt says he delivers to those involved, but the second Blue Pie is the one that Matt actually bakes [the victims with].

Blomfield will then cause the creditors to react and he will farm the liquidation off to the likes of Greg “a-cunt-ant” Sherrif at Grant Thornton, and the victim will be the next Shiv Mattu. In that fraud, Blomfield pretended to be a lawyer that worked alongside Bruce Johnson as equal law practice partners. Unfortunately Shiv Mattu is now penniless, like all of Blomfields victims.

Sheriff probably gave Blomfield the idea to photo shop the last remaining fraudulent image on Blomfields fraudsite;


It took us a simple google search to find the image of the building and the site that allowed you to photoshop the lettering. If you look at the left hand side the letter and image is going out of focus and the writing is slightly falling down on the right side.


Evidence that Bishop Warden is a fundtasy of Blomfields diseased brain. Fuck Blomfields a clown, but sadly his victims are bigger clowns.

LF understands that Mr Mattu is making good ground with the New Zealand Police in Oamaru over the shonky practices of Blomfield and his criminal lawyer crony Bruce Johnson. Also various honest liquidators are still on Blomfields tail.

Liquidator Greg Sherriff, Blomfield stooge and corrupt proffessional, failed to perform liquidations in accordance with the law.

Greg Sheriff, criminal enabler of leading Accountancy Fleecing Firm Grant Thornton. Beware of this thieving south African prick. Blomfield and Sheriff are two p smokers in a pipe.

We have recently found evidence that Blomfield is doing his best to partner up with another thief and fraudster, and previous Ray White Real Estate Agent, Aaron Drever, but that the business dealings are going a bit sideways, as Mr Drever is allegedly tired of being in the media as a result of some great work by Herald Journalist Lane Nichols.

Screen Shot 2016-03-27 at 20.47.03

Matthew John Blomfield, AKA Businessman, Lawyer, Corporate Governance Executor, film maker, Marketing Guru, banker [and wanker], fraudster, thief, and lastly connoisseur of cheesy cock, best smoked…. The Sting-Master of his circus called Con Tent. Get it?

Blomfield and Drever operate what they call an “acid test”, this is where they strip victims of their assets, leaving them burned. Drevers favourite saying is “you have to break eggs to make an Omelete. At the moment these two eggs are trying to crack each other big time with threats of ruination being fired both ways. Those emails are coming to LF via encrypted facilities, but from what we have seen so far, Mr Blomfield is for a slow and tortuous roasting on the stand, when the emails are supplied to all of the media during the defamation trial. Slater is too dumb but he should seek discovery of the emails that Blomfield holds, or knows where Blomfield knows where the emails are stored, that tell the true story of how Blomfield is still operating fraudulently with the likes of Aaron Drever, Ray White, inclusive of Martin Honeys Pure Realty Limited, and Bruce Johnson.


Shiv Mattu – defrauded of Hundreds of Thousands of Dollars by Matthew Blomfield, Greg Sherrif, and Bruce Johnson. The IRD bankrupted Mr Mattu and let Matthew Blomfield and his criminal enablers off scott free……but for how long?

From sources within the Auckland High Court, LF understands that Colin Craig is being completely ridiculed by those that he defamed, but in turn he alleges defamed him. According to an LF source Blomfield turned up dressed and smelling as if he had slept in a dumpster, and listened to what is to happen to him, until he became agitated due to his dependency on the P Pipe and left for a smoke and a three day sleep [we suspect in the same dumpster].


Lane “sane” Nichols whose has been onto Mr Drever, but has totally missed the association between Mr Drever, Mr Blomfield, and others, purchasing and on selling property they have acquired at under value.

LF has been lucky enough to have an insider secreted in the Blomfield camp, and that person has told us these interesting facts as to how Blomfield is going to escape jurisdiction after the Balloon goes up.


Aaron [what cash before I dash] Drever can’t remember his own name so he puts it on his shirt. We applaud Aaron losing all that weight. But mate you are still fucking ugly on the inside. We applaud Aaron for not falling for Blomfield’s lies – but hey it takes a fraudster to recognize a fraudster.

Talking about Blomfield supporters in the media. Consummate teabaggers of Blomfield, Shayne “Scrot Tickler” Currie, and David “Arse Licker” Fisher, need a mention.


The nutjob Journo duo “The Tickler and the Licker”. Consummate teabaggers and arse rimmers of Blomfield, Shayne Currie, and David Fisher. A checker board of Corruption in the media

We laughed at the real life photographs of these two wankers, as against the professional photographs at the top. We put the real life images at the bottom where such life belongs.


It’s not that Colin thinks he’s Daniel Craig, nor that he loves himself – it’s just that he’s a complete fuckwit that makes Ben Rachinger look sane. As a boss Colin would try and stick his nose into his secretaries private bits. As a Politician he stuck his foot so far up his arse, that its now firmly stuck in his gob. Hes now known as Colin-oscopy Craig. Its not that hes stupid – well yes it is.

Making up a fraudulent website containing fraudulent intention must be a criminal offence. Blomfields fraudrecord is the stuff of internet legend. But yet he has the audacity to just keep going, and going. We understand that once Slater buries Blomfield using emails galore, that he will go to press with all manner of juicy shit that will drown Blomfield and his mates forever.


We have not had an update on the defamation case between Blomfield and Slater, but if we do we will keep our readership up to date. Meanwhile we will keep fisting Blomfields date with the chopped off arms of his victims. But when two cunt’s with no cash to rub together do battle in court, it’s the only time there can be no loser. Does that make these two cunts “wosers” or “linners”.

For potential victim safety we commissioned some experts to create an image of what Blomfield would look like in another 10 years and the results were thought provoking about how Blomfield might ultimately have to pay for his bad deeds done stupidly.


You might notice that the younger version is of the face of Mr Blomfield 10 years ago, and the updated picture is an image of what Mr Blomfields head will look like from behind. The artist apparently drew the image of a face, but immediately destroyed it. He charged only half his normal fee and explained that two decades of cock smoking results in horrible disfiguration.

But on a more serious note such behaviour by Blomfield and the main stream media, is dangerous to all New Zealanders who are not warned about the criminal behaviour of the likes of Matthew Blomfield, Greg Sheriff, and Bruce Johnson, and accountancy firms like Grant Thornton.


Mr X knew a thing or two about the corrupt media, and who they really represent. LF does too.

Lauda Finem is to report this fraudulent website to the Commerce Commission, not that those stupid cunts will act, but just for the hell of it.

LF received some Blomfield Jokes that we would like to repeat for our readerships enjoyment!!!

What do you call Blomfield when he is chased up a tree by a creditor?

Branch Manager.

What do you have if you’ve got Blomfield up to his neck in cement?

Not enough cement.

What is the worst 10 years of Mr Blomfields life?

Primary School.

Why do neighbors go to Blomfields garage sales?

To get their stuff back.

What is Blomfield in a car or on a motorbike?


What does Blomfield give to his kids on Christmas day.

Neighbor kids presents.

What do you get when you cross a gorilla with Blomfield?

A dumb and ugly gorilla.

What would a creditor do when seeing Blomfield with half a head?


Why is Blomfields cock so small?

As a kid he liked playing with his mates cocks.

Why did Blomfield fall of his bike?

He didn’t, he fell off a nicked bike.

Whats the difference between a dog shit and Blomfield?


Why does Blomfield stink?

So blind people can hate him too.

What do you say to Blomfield when he is wearing a suit?

Will the defendant please stand.

What is Blomfields idea of foreplay?

Fucking creditors

But not all of Blomfields childhood memories are bad. He often thinks about the earliest memory of beach play with his parents and the day he graduated from primary school


Matthew Blomfield graduating from Primary School with an average F minus

All that time chopping others dollars had to have its toll. Deal with Bishop Warden at your peril.

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